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by Zdeněk Burian |
A day's ride from town...
Dungeon Setting
The Palace of a Moon Wizard is on the third level of a dungeon. It's built on a subterranean lake around a deep wide deep pit that penetrates the whole dungeon. The cavern was some kind of technologically advanced civilization a few million years ago and has since flooded, leaving only a few priceless machines sticking out of the mud, beneath the lake, waiting to be powered on or broken. The tidal nature of the place was a draw to the Moon Wizard, enamored with the dark shifting waters. It reminds him of his home on the Moon. They set an observatory here to gaze upon her
The lake's nasty erratic tide is due to malfunctioning ancient machinery. It has a 1-in-6 chance each Turn (10 minutes) to shift from low tide to mid tide and then to high tide before reversing on the same odds.
At low tide the lowest levels of the palace are damp, about 1 ft. of water, the drink streaming in and out of sluices, drains and portcullises with the waves. Only basements remain flooded. The water level is even with The Pit, gently lapping at the edges.
At mid tide the lowest levels are entirely underwater. It laps at the stair landings and windows of the second floor. The water streams into The Pit, carrying loose objects with it. A hard STR check resists its pull if you're in the courtyard.
At high tide the second floors are filled with water. The courtyard of The Pit is replaced with an irresistible whirlpool. Save vs Doom or be sucked down to level 4.
Only the third floors escapes flooding.
Other places on the lake are too, affected by and in tune with the tides. Revisiting or lingering at certain places will reveal treasures and dangers. Smart players will use the tides to their advantage, timing them to reach high places with ease or investigate low areas. Less smart players will drown! So let them stumble into...
...The Subterranean Lake of the Moon Wizard Palace!
Dungeon Factions
The Exiles
Fishman [AC as Leather, Chain in water, 1 Hit]
Range. Near (vomit, stab) Intimate (bite), 1 Hit
Threats. Blind (vomit), glowing target (vomit), emasculated (stab) limb swallowed (bite)*
Protected. In a school (5+ fishmen)
Swarm aggressively, flank underwater, bite and run away into the next
room. Displays of ostentatious magic test their morale (-2)
*[Limb isn't lost just can't use it because it has a fishman sucked to it]
HQ. The first floor of the master bedroom [Palace, 5]
Means. Spear that shoots lightning, helm that sees everything, fanatical devotion of a few dozen toxically masculine fishmen
Motive. Earn back the amnesty of their river spirit goddess by sacrificing either treasure or creatures to The Pit
Opportunity. High Tide.
They have the heads of salmon, devoid of color save for right before danger, emotional outbursts or vomiting phlegm, where they turn bright red. They wear tall pointy hats and enormous ceremonial codpieces (unnecessary due to lack of anatomy) due to their toxic masculinity.
They once had fish-ladies but they were punished and exiled here by their river spirit progenitor for defiling her shrine with graffiti. They hope throwing enough sacrifices into The Pit will allow them to come home; it won't. Getting them to apologize will, and it will open up a secret door behind a waterfall on their island to level 4 that the dark elves don't know about.
Their leader is Strange-Shrimp (2 HD) who thinks instead of people, treasure should be thrown down into the Pit. He thinks he is the smartest fishman and that they were exiled for being too emotional, and he is rough and uninterested in what you have to say, waiting for his turn to talk at you. He plots to steal the magic helm from his second-in-command but none of the other fishmen like him and he fears retaliation. He has a spear that shoots lightning bolts and the largest codpiece.
The second in command is Big-Helm (3 HD) and thinks Strange-Shrimp should be thrown down The Pit first and the dark elf interlopers (or nosy players) second. He thinks he is the strongest fishman and that they were exiled for being too weak, so he projects this onto everyone else. He fears being killed horribly by lightning bolts. He has a Helm of Leering, allowing him to see in all directions and into "open containers" like pockets and unlocked chests within. 10 ft of him. Average codpiece he uses to store 1d6 sp.
There are 60 odd Fishmen down here with 22 of them holed up in the Palace. 1d3+3 more can be summoned for every 3 fishmen that spend a round ululating and trilling in harmony.
If 10+ Hits worth of Fishman blood is spilled, a krakenling who hibernates at the bottom of the lake will awake and investigate. All the fishmen speak of it in legend but have never actually seen it happen. Stats as tidal wave or hurricane or medium sized army.
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| Ordovician Marine by Doug Henderson |
Grennir gunn-más
Axe Ballet. Counter! Parry or Riposte
| Dark Elf. [AC as Leather, Chain in darkness, 2 Hits]
Range: Near (axe), Close (thrown axe, dart), Far (Eviscerate eyes), 1 Hit.
Threats: Disarmed (axe), Poisoned (dart, axe: choose delirium: doff all armor, clothes, weapons etc or weakness: highest stat quartered), Blinded (eviscerate eyes)
Special Hits: Premonitions of Horrific Fate
Protection. from anyone while in darkness
Ambush, take hostages, fight dirty, never if
outnumbered, snuff out torches. The first person to down a dark elf gets mercilessly
targeted.
HQ. The Scullery [Palace 3]
Means. Magic killing rope, deadly poisons and urchin darts, much treasure* and a giant sea scorpion trapped in a pantry
Motive. Persuade the wizard to help them, prove their strength in incompatible ways
Opportunity. Low tide.
Dark Elf Coins - black, matte and dipped in blood. Used to pay for assassinations and mercenaries by and between dark elf clans. They keep the gold of those who try and fail to kill them. Beware a dark elf who jingles when they walk. 1d6 x 100 per Hit on each.
They are the Nordic kind of elves, borne of maggots, lithe and sinewy. Blacker than pitch, with beady eyes like little black spheres, they possess nasty attitudes, practical axes and old old world values. They have been officially sent by their Warlord to parlay with the wizard on her behalf about removing a precocious gem dragon from their level. They bring precious gifts of the underworld to trade [See Palace, 3]. As is tradition, different conflicting and violent plans have been given to the parlay's two leaders by the warlord to test them.
Each carries an elfing on its back [AC Unarmored, 1 Hit], an awful grub the size of a torso whom they intend to anoint in blood before they pupate. Dark elves weaponize their instars. One pupae will be left behind, hidden in a wall or crevice somewhere to act as a spy. Like a sleeper agent, when it metamorphoses it will perform some act of espionage or violence before returning home and being welcomed into the clan.
Their party leader is Brailtoil the Sorcerer [MU 3], a young elf whose honor is on the line with the success of this parlay. She has also been told in confidence that it is Mirkthrift's blood that is to anoint the elflings which distresses her greatly for she respects him. She has a living rope 30 ft. long that obeys his command. It can climb, bind and strangle with a word.
Her iron bound spell book is chained about her waste and locked with a key she keeps in her left boot. It contains Nightmare, Savage Portal, Charm Person and Invisibility. If the pages see light, they will burn up.
Mirkthrift the Unready [Ftr 5] is the eldest and most experienced elf but is poorly favored by his warlord due to a bad knee and has been demoted to male for previous quest's failure . This is his last chance to prove himself before he should begin sleeping with one eye open. His Warlord told him to bring back the head of Brailtoil. Instead of an elfing on his back, he carries an urn of cave urchins, which are covered in deadly venomous spines. They can be thrown like darts or sling stones.
The way the warlord sees it either a wife-concubine comes back with the head of a son who was not ready for the title of warlord or a daughter returns ready to ascend at any cost. Dark elf politics and gender are irrevocably intertwined
There were 14 dark elves here, one a traitor left ham-stringed and tied to The Pit to die after failing to kill Mirkthrift. The 13 left are uneasy, extremely superstitious about the number. It makes them doubt Brailtoil's favor and readiness. The players will find this unlucky 14th at the first low tide they spend in the dungeon.
The Moon Wizard
Invisible in water
HQ. Anywhere in the castle but the observatory. They mourn often in the armory.
Means. A vast repertoire of powerful spells, if they can ever return to their true form, 3ooogp in coins
Motive. Keep their friends safe, clear their palace of interlopers, send their friend home to the Moon
Opportunity. None currently, they weeps, spirit broken
Once a Moon Wizard [MU 15], they peered too deeply at the moon for too long through their telescope. Gazing too long, they claim a moon Nereid princeling of the Lunar seas cursed them with Moonsickness and that is why they have become a water elemental, water inside turned outside, skeleton still floating inside.
They are indifferent about being returned to their old form (they can feel the pull of the moon better in this form, their beloved this way) but a spell of Transmogrification or similar may sway them so they can return to it. For defending their castle from raiding fishmen or ousting the dark elves (they have no desire to help them) they will grant the party a Wish which all wizards may do if aided though they keep this a secret. A Wish magically does whatever a mortal could do in 100 years, in an instant.
They cry because they cannot send their beloved friend and castellan Nigel back to the Moon, and for other reasons. In this form they cannot fix the Teleporter in his Observatory [Palace, 4] and no mortal in a hundred years could reach the Moon. For helping Nigel they would grant them three Wishes. They only thing that could push them to fight is danger to one they calls friend.
Nigel, castellan [Ftr 3]. Evolved Eurytperid from the Moon. Dim but clever, speaks in monosyllabic rasps. Unsure how to revert his master but skilled at arms and knowledgeable of the lake. Wants to go back home. He has never heard of a moon Nereid princeling.
Archide the Big, apprentice [MU 1]. Tried to help his master with magic, Doom sucked him into the reflective lens of the telescope. Can now only haunt the demesne in reflections. Helps reliable, trustworthy or magically inclined players. Tricks or waylays robbers. His illusion spells still work, refracted through the glass and water. He hates it down here and hopes to become rich enough to go home and marry a girl he's sweet on.
The Underground Lake
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| by Sir Roderick Impey Murchison, The Silurian System. |
Navigating the Lake
The Moon Palace is found on this subterranean lake and only locatable by the sound of The Pit sucking in water, unheard over the screaming. They may spend a turn listening and feeling and triangulating to navigate this way. Think of it like a layered point crawl, more routes being revealed as problems are solved:
By Vibration: All of the ancient machines can be found by feeling vibrations only after the great and awful churning of The Pump has been stopped. Its grumble is omnipresent like the feeling of blood rushing in your own ears.
By Sound: Several locations can be found by listening such as the singing of the mushroom men, but only after the awful unending screams of the vargouilles are eliminated.
By Sight: There is no light anywhere on the lake besides The Fishmen Archipelago's soft green Power Cell unless the lighthouse at the Palace is lit. Instead, creatures navigate by "ghost-light", bioluminescent algae that glow in the octarine spectrum. Ghostlight reveals all locations on the lake, air and water currents and the hidden beauty of the entire ecosystem.
Dark elves have a balm they apply to their eyes to see and carry 1d6 uses. The Fishmen have evolved a third eyelid they use to see it. Midge will sell you "ghost-light goggles" for 1ooogp (made from fishmen eyelids, -4 to reaction rolls with them). The players will need conventional light sources until then and are unlikely to surprise anyone while they're lit.
Conceptual Point Crawl for the Lake
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| Not a geographic map, it shows "crawls" between points and their barriers players would follow |
If the players insist on navigating the lake using only sight e.g. randomly, then roll 1d20 each turn they travel. If the result is below the Underclock roll, they find a random locale.
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Vehicle |
mph |
Lake cross/Circumnavigate |
Dungeon Turns |
|
Canoe |
2 |
30 minutes/ 3.5 hours |
3/21 |
|
Skimmer |
10 |
6 minutes/ 30 minutes |
1/6 |
|
Dunkleosteus |
6 |
10 minutes/ 50 minutes |
1/5 |
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| Possibly by William Scheele |
Locations on the Lake
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| A spatial map should the players light the lighthouse |
A. The Fishmen Archipelago. Can be seen as a soft green glow anywhere on the lake. Most fishmen live here, childishly arguing, lounging or measuring masculinity by whatever means they can invent. At high tide its three islands with huts sticking up out of the water, fishmen fighting for space away from lake predators. At low tide a sandbar connects all three islands.
Dock #1. A tall wooden statue of a river goddess holding a "lantern" where boats can and are tied off. At high tide only her head and arm is above water. At low tide the water is at her knees. Her eyes are cut sapphires worth 5oogp each and in her outstretched hands she holds a Power Cell, appearing as a strange looking green glowing hooded lantern.
2-in-6 chance a canoe here has a sleeping fishman hidden away who will pop out at the worst possible time.
Sacrificial Island. When the omens seem most foul, when reaction rolls are bad or when they're bored the fishmen will try to sacrifice just about anything to the lake on this small outlying island. Two poles with old ropes to tie sacrifices to and giant bite marks appear next to a 5 ft. tall bell which they ring to summon a "demon most foul". The Dunkleosteus knows this means dinner soon and appears within 1d4 Turns or the next mid tide.
At both mid and high tide this island is completely underwater.
B. The Vargouille Shale. Can be heard from anywhere on the lake. A small, jagged island, nearly vertical cliffside, where vargouilles nest like demonic sea birds except the nests are their old bodies stuffed into cracks. They must return to their old necks to slumber or they perish. They must drink blood or they perish. 50 ft tall at low tide, 30 at high tide when they are most vicious and territorial.
Vargouille. [AC as Leather, 1 Hit]Range: Intimate (lick, bite); 1 Hit, Far (vertical vertebral drop)Threats: Awful disease (bite) repulsion of others (lick) broken foot (drop)
They like to drop from above and impale you with the jagged remnants of their neck vertebrae (2 Hits). This the only time they're not screaming. Whether impaled or not, they will attempt to spread their curse to you by licking the inside of your ear (+4 if impaled). On a success, you are cursed and lose 1 CHA every hour you are not upside down (common folklore but true). When you reach 5 CHA you are overcome with the desire to reach the shale by any means necessary and stuff yourself into a crack or hole as high up as possible. At 1 CHA your ears grow into wings, and you break your own neck off as your final act before a new vargouille flies off to join the colony. Can be cured in the usual way of curses; spells, exorcisms, lobotomy and the like. Holding your head underwater for an hour also works.
Teleporter #1. Can be found in shallow cave at the top of the shale using a Power Cell. It thrums, but more quietly than The Pump.
C. The Pump. Can be heard only after the vargouilles are silenced. Its thrumming prevents the detection of other machines until fixed. An enormous piece of ancient machinery that alternately spews and sucks up thousands of gallons of water on a random basis every 1 in 6 turns. It is the source of the tides on the lake. It's made up of three parts: an enormous pipe that sucks up the water, a massive reservoir tank that holds all the water and horrific enormous turbines in the tank that push the water back out the top of the reservoir in a giant 100 ft. wide waterfall.
The Pipe. 10 ft. wide. Hard STR save to not be sucked into it when the tide goes out. Takes a hard 90-degree turn into the tank where it passes through a metal grate clogged with awful ancient debris, sludge and algae.
The Tank. 200 ft tall but 100-150 ft of it are underwater depending on the tide. Slick plasteel on the sides. Holds the enormous turbines that suck water back up to push out the side in a water fall. 1d6+3 Spark Sprites live here, feeding on the power made by the turbines. Stats as will o' the wisps with a zap that does 1 Hit. When threatened they run to a massive algal shambling mound hidden amongst the sludge, passively filter feeding in a strange relationship with the spark sprites in the tank. It has integrated a Power Cell into its bulk that acts as capacitor they fill with power. This has stimulated it to grow huge [7 Hits] and glow green. It flashes brightly 1 round before it releases the stored energy in either a lightning bolt that chains to up to three creatures, metal clad preferentially [6d6 damage spread out amongst all targets] or heals itself [6d6] points. It takes 3 sprites 1 round each to repower the Cell (the mound receives no natural healing from lightning until the thirsty Cell is fueled).
The Turbines. Two house-sized turbines reside in the warehouse sized reservoir. One is currently wedged stuck with an immovable rod, putting them out of sync and the other stopping and starting at random. It is the source of the erratic tides. Should it be fixed, the turbines will instantly roar to life sucking up and shredding anything inside the reservoir into paste [10d6 damage no save, low damage is insane luck. 1 broken limb per 6 damage]. The tides would then return to a slow gentle 24-hour cycle and the whole thing would quiet down.
D. Mushroom Man Beach and Grove. Can only be heard singing once the Vargouilles are silenced. A colony of myconoids live here in a mushroom grove. They are in a proxy war with the dark elves who slaughter them in response to their attempts at friendship. The mushroom men have decided that the elf conquest of the dungeon must be curtailed through hallucinogens and the gentle comfortable enslavement of their city below. They also sing cute songs all day long! These can be heard if the players sail closely enough or if The Pump is fixed. Their Armory (a house-sized, rooted myconoid) currently has a Power Cell and Teleporter #2 which they are happy to let you use if you ask nicely.
They know what this place really is. The immovable rod in The Turbine is theirs. They're happy to give you another one to stop the second turbine so the place gets real fetid. They warn against getting churned to bits like their last "friends"
The Garden. They are happy to show you the garden, where their "friends" reside. There's a 3-in-6 that each of the following prisoners are down here and a further 3-in-6 they are so full of hallucinogens. The trilobite knight is always there, having a bad trip.
- 1d6 Dark Elves from a previous expedition
- A great hulking troll [5 Hits]. He's particularly troublesome because he sheds so much and hacks up so much phlegm that the spores struggle to take root. Drinking his blood grants temporary immunity.
- 3d6 chaotic goblins, thoroughly enjoying their trip and asking for more much to the mushroom men's bewilderment.
- 1d4 white apes, rapidly gaining sentience, empathy, culture and language as they trip.
- A fat old dreamsnake, a giant serpent that gorges on visions and dreams they way an anaconda does capybara. Stats as enormous snake.
- A trilobite knight. He came here to cut down the Armory but underestimated their spores. He has not forgotten.
Hidden Treasure. At low tide, way out onto the surf, a brass periscope sticks up a few feet out of the water. If the brass port hole is dug up the players can enter into an ancient advanced amphibious war-submarine. If activated with three power cells and the Brass Key from the Palace Observatory [5] it comes to life: a 30 ft. long lobster-like deep sea submersible complete with battle claws and life support.
E. The Old Man of the Lake. A 30 ft. floats here vertically, chained to an ancient machine called a skimmer, that zooms faster than a horse if powered with a Power Cell. It can only be felt if the Pump has been fixed, the tree acting like a resonator for it its idling. Unchaining the tree awakens a thankful nature spirit in the form of an enchanted talking tree. If you help it leave the dungeon (no small feat) it will grant you a wish because its a tree wizard, and wizards must grant wishes if saved thought they keep this rule a secret (A wish does anything a
F. Isle of the Forgotten Robot. Hidden on a small random island in the lake, underwater at all but low tide, lies a robot buried in the muck. It cannot be seen or heard or felt unless The Pump has been fixed and the Vargouilles silenced. Then once an hour it beeps, audible across the lake. If dug up and found it will protect its humans with a tenderness and humanity a person never could. It follows the Three Laws of Robotics and its name is Robbie.
Servo-Prescience. Counter! If attacked dodges out of the way.
| Bulletproof Plasteel Skin. [AC as Plate and Shield, 5 Hits] Counter! If a human is Near Robbie is attacked, Robbie intercepts the attack.
|| Extendo-Hands. Counter! If hit a human falls or is grappled, he may grab them and pull them to safety
|| Robbie [AC as Plate, 3 Hits] Counter! If a human would fail saving throw, he interposes himself between them and him.
||| Personality Core [AC 0, 1 Hit] Counter! If a human would fail a save vs a mind attack or enchantment, he will try to break it.
Range. Intimate (Shield from all harm), Near (intercept hit), Close (Extendo-hand rescue)
P. The Moon Wizard Palace. The Pit can be heard once the Vargouilles are silenced See next section.
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| by Charles R. Knight |
Random Encounters Sailing on the Lake
- The Dunkleosteus, breaching like a whale. Intrigued it begins following the players, growing bolder with every roll of this encounter.
- A morse code signal from the Moon Palace (it's the Gauth, Glargox; the code is just his insane vainglorious ramblings and demands for freedom)
- A curious Orthoceras attempts to clamber into your boat with you or a frightened one shoots up out of the water into it, escaping a predator. Stats as giant octopus with AC as Chain.
- A pack of Pterygotus churning along under the surf. Following them leads to a locale on the lake and food. Stats as wolves or giant scorpions with no venom
- Midge the Mansquito aboard his barge, selling his wares:
- Ghost-light goggles 1ooogp. Let you see into the octarine spectrum
- An antique diving suit with 100 ft. of hose.
- Potion of Liquefaction. Horribly melts you into a living puddle with all the benefits and restrictions therein. You are still a slave to gravity in this form, any increase on elevation more than 5 ft. is a difficult STR check
- A small living cephalopod. If swallowed it allows you to breathe water but does 1 damage every hour as it bites your stomach testily. Must be vomited up within a day or things get much worse.
- A small mountains of dung.
- A shrunken Vargouille head charm. Scares Vargouilles away as Turn Undead. He swears it works.
- Absolutely claustrophobic quiet for 15 seconds
The Palace of the Moon Wizard: 5-Room Dungeon
Random Encounters
- An annoying water elemental that tries to carry you off towards the lighthouse. 2-in-6 it surprises +1 per tide level. If not surprising, it's found crying, staring up to the heavens.
- 1d6+1 Fishmen squabbling over "the goddess's desires!", raw fish blood dripping down their chins.
- 1d4+1 Dark Elves making camp, setting a trap or performing intense skaldic poetry.
- Dunkleosteus testing, hunting, watching.
- 1d2 giant methane bubbles. Float on water, can be moved around and stick to walls. Explosively flammable, enough to blast a 5 ft. hole in a wall
- A strange reflection that isn't yours, beckoning you.
Locations
The Palace. All floors are a beautiful, polished checkerboard pattern of what looks like black basalt and white marble. Walls are curving and twisting like modern art, more organic in appearance than structural. The material of the walls and floors are strange, acting like plastic. Besides at The Dock, all outer walls are flush with the lake and difficult to scale. All doors on the first and second floors hide portcullises that fall down, trapping players on a 2-in-6. There is no light anywhere unless the light house is lit.1. Armory. All doors locked. The Guath and Nigel have key.
Downstairs. Awful squishy waterlogged carpet. 20 sets of moon-helms, moon-spears and moon-mail, all wet but untouched. Curious Orthoceras swim/clamber here at mid/low tide through a hidden entrance from the lake. A once gorgeous, detailed, accurate globe of the lunar surface made from ivory hung in here, replaced by a dashed mound of shattered ivory. Worth 1o,ooosp if mended.
Upstairs. Filled with giant mussels that open during mid and high tide. One contains a pearl worth 1ooosp. In the center of the room sits three pedestals, one with a bizarre looking metal wand of disintegration sitting under an air tight bell jar filled with an evil sentient poisonous vapor (it is actually the Atomic Pistol of the Toadman stored in the Observatory). The other has a Buisine of Infinity which can hold an infinite amount of liquid. If emptied (it currently) contains a few million gallons of water) and blown it summons the holy host, an angel of terrifying and awesome power with all that that entails. The third is smashed, empty, save an old staff holster sans staff.
2. Lighthouse. If relit blinds fishmen and dark elves (-4 to hit). Stairs wind narrowly upwards clockwise between levels, giving right-handed creatures a +4 bonus when fighting with the high ground against other right-handed creature (fishmen are predominantly right-handed, dark elves ambidextrous, the bastards). It may also end the moonlight curse on the wizard.
Downstairs. Filled to the brim with deadly methane gas and 1d6 giant bubbles. Tiny ones can be seen seeping out from under the doorway. Higher tides push the methane up to the next floor. If ignition source is presented treat the room as the epicenter of an old school fireball spell effecting 33,000 cubic ft (the first and second floor is only 12,500 cft. each).
If undisturbed refills within 24 hours.
Upstairs. A simple room furnished with a moldering moon-rug and a waterlogged desk. The desk contains a grimoire that can only be open, read and transcribed 100 ft. under water
It contains the spells Air Bubble Head, Moonsong and Spixerafix's Silurian Peace.
Landing. Cold wet metal coal brazier and elaborate mirrors. Ziplines connect to the top of the scullery and the top of the armory.
3. Scullery. Dark Elves have holed up here. Room is split between elaborate modern art dining room and medieval kitchen with pantry.
Dining Room. Waterlogged sinusoidal table, can be a raft in a pinch. Rouleaux triangle plates, rusted arbelos shaped cutlery. Cold untouched dinner. The dark elves have set up a camp here, enamored with the fine, strange craftsmanship.
Treasure. 10 Fine gems worth 1ooogp useful for scrying spells, 3 liters of the finest spirits enchanted to en-drunken with a single swig, and 10 lbs. of cave whale ambergris acquired at great expense worth 1ooogp down here and ten times that on the surface to the right buyer.
Kitchen. Crumbling chimney. Rusted meat cleavers. Roiling algal bloom stew. A rogue Jaekelopterus lairs in the pantry trapped by the elves to be released in a pinch.
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| By Marie Hubrecht |
4. Wizards Observatory. Due to the Moonsong curse, the entire building is magically flooded from top to bottom. The front door is inlaid with infernal metal armor. Attempting to open the door without being dry as a bone causes it to fly to the interloper and forcibly don itself upon them. While usually quite helpful, most cannot swim in plate mail.
First Floor. Hall of Life displaying the organisms of the Moon Wizard's extraplanar travels shrunken and transmogrified down into little sea sponge equivalents. They are stored under delicate watertight bell jars and should they touch water, the spells acting on them will quickly end and they will grow into life-sized simulacra of:
A Psychic Mercurian Mega Shrimp - 2 Hits, AC as Chain, Grasping Claws x2 1d6, psychic blast Save or lose 2d6 INT. Psychically controls anyone brought to 3 INT or below. Coward.
Venusian Saw-Toothed Salamander - 3 Hits, AC as Leather, Slicing Maw x2 1d6, 5+ damage Save or lose limb. Ambusher.
A Lunar Trap-Jawed Shield Fish - The other half of the mated pair of the Dunkleosteus and the reason for its ire. Clever Brute.
A Vile Greater Scarlet Saturnian Toadman - 7 Hits, AC as Leather, Razar-sharp Wrist Blades x2 2d6. Telepathy and telekinesis. Knows a vile alien word that freezes all living creatures if they hear it and have less HP than a roll of the Toadman's current HD for 3d6 rounds. Has amoebae form like an ooze. Will go for its Atomic Pistol in the armory and revenge against the wizard from there. Makes an excellent villain.
The last of these is covered in scratch marks from the outside, as though something has tried and failed to gain entry.
Second Floor. Hall of History, displaying the artifacts of the Moon Wizards cosmological travels in tall rectangular delicate glass display cases. Of note:
A Large Brass Key, required to start the battle-apparatus hidden in the Mushroom Men's grove
A Mercurian Battle Suit - Made from the hide of a meculloid, a liquid living metal monster, it is a second skin that allows you to withstand intense heat, cold and pressure. The arms can form weapons. It's currently in stasis and will be awoken by sunlight.
Teleporter #3, the kind you and your party step into. It's one of a trio scattered around the lake. It can send you to one of them or anywhere else if you know the right frequencies. This one's Power Cell is depleted.
A Saturninan Antimatter Rifle. Destroys any inorganic matter, force field or spell effect in a perfect circle 10 ft. wide with a quiet phwip. Organic matter with 5+ Hits must save or have a random limb be vaporized, those with less save or become history. It's missing its ammo converter, as Nigel has hidden it away out of grief.
Trilobite Knight Shield. Belongs to the trilobite knight in the Mushroom Grove who would very much like to both have it back and be rescued if he wasn't tripping so hard.
Third Floor. Observatory Room. Giant telescope. Comfortable floating lounge chairs.
Wizard's observatory telescope allows you to peer between worlds. Its last setting setting has it zoomed in on a quiet lunar lake not unlike the one in the cave but full of light and life. 50% of the time evolved Eurytpterid's can be seen playing or fishing in the water. A burned down estate can be seen on a hill in the background.
The thinnest point by the eye piece has three rotating bands of symbols correlating to times, places and realms (for one place may exist in many realms). Match them up to the ones in your world or use the Realm of Man, the Planets (including the Moon), the Elemental Realms, and the Realm of Faerie. Just as well, with a creature's true name you can watch them in real time. In conjunction with the currently depowered Teleporter at the observatory, one could feasibly go anywhere and almost anywhen they like, though this is not advised.
5. Master Bedroom. The Fishmen have holed up here on the first floor, positive great treasure lies on the second floor. Beautiful Cooksonia grows everywhere throughout in strangely shaped potted plants.
Downstairs. Furnished strangely, modern art aesthetics. Lunar bar. Quicksilver pool. Trashed by Fishmen who have made a slimy den here and play juvenile games of toughness like who can get punched in the stomach the most. A dead one lies at the bottom of the stairs, head blasted off from lazer fire.
Upstairs. Ornate canopy bed. Glass viewing veranda to outer battlements. Fancy music box.
Guarded by a grating gauth called Garrison General Glargox the Glamorous under a geas in green garb (an emerald cloak with a high high collar). He wears a splendid amulet set with moon stone (5oogp). He is compelled to:
1. Obey the wizard and Nigel (except in one instance)
2. Protect the wizard's bedroom from interlopers and
3. Never give the wizard the golden key
Should the compulsion be removed (a working any dark elf could do with time), he would happily torture and devour everyone with his lazer eyes, for he feeds on grief and despair. He is well-fed. He has a silver armory key and a gold treasure chest key
Treasure. A Saturnian Toadman Cloak and High Collar hangs on a post by the bed. +3 AC, levitation, reflects lazer fire on a 5-in-6.
An Orb. Holds some of the Moon Wizard's spells, their memories of the Moon and why they can never return. It also imprisons a very old demon named Fierg.
The spells can be rolled randomly from here.
A Treasure chest, with a golden lock. Holds a draught of sleeping with enough doses to sleep until the end of time, a beautiful stiletto athame (+3 to hit, excellent ritual device) and the ammo capacitor for the antimatter rifle.
6. The Pit. Covered in raggedy old netting to catch anything that drops from above. Difficult to traverse. Gnarled burnt wizard staff hangs precariously in the center. Projects strength in the form of a powerful impenetrable bubble force field that block all instances of elemental damage. Also gives you hope and warmth while you use it (+1 Hit). It can instantly dry you and light fires instantly where appropriate.
7. The Dock. 50% Chance each turn Midge arrives or leaves with his wares. Slick plastic faux-marble lead stairs up to the courtyard and The Pit
~
Blame Hilander. He said I had to.
